THE JACOBS FACTOR

Do you know the greatest challenge we have as humans? I want you to seriously think about it and give yourself some moment away from your work station to really reflect on this. Every time I think of this challenge, I think of Jacob. Jacob is the regular guy from the bible who upon facing this basic human challenge was able to rebrand himself from Jacob to Israel. Jacob left his father's house with nothing and returned with 2 wives, 2 concubines, 11 children and a massive wealth and economic portfolio. Though it took him 20 years to achieve this result, he achieved it nonetheless after overcoming this basic human hindrance.

In this contemporary time, we would say Jacob lived a Jewish dream just like most young men in Nigeria leave their father's house or father's country to seek for their Nigerian dream. Every dream has an economic imprint to it; the dream then becomes more substantiated if the person attained this economical progress through doing what he truly enjoys doing. Jay Jay Okocha is a living proof of a true Nigerian dream and was honored for it 2 days ago with a novel match. Not all dreams are accompanied with fame but you can imagine Okocha doing what some people consider as a hobby and making economic progress with it.

If we look deep to what we consider as a hobby, therein lies what we truly enjoy doing. What we truly enjoy doing is thus not necessary a sequential or regulated task we must accomplish in order to get emolument but a state of euphoria and joy when we tackle a project. This state of euphoria and joy is thus a state of being our true selves. The greatest challenge we have as human being is being our true selves. It is difficult for most people to discover their identity and align themselves to it. Some people are able to discover who they are but the difficulty lies in staying true to who they are.

Doing what you truly enjoy doing is your creative self expression; it is being who you are truly designed to be; it is where your unlimited power is tapped from; it is a life of freedom – a life where possibilities overrides limitations. It's a state that can be intuitively recognized and guided by deep rooted desire. Pablo Picasso – a foremost painter/artist – gives us a hint into what it is like to align ourselves to our true nature:

«I don't know in advance what I am going to put on canvass anymore than I decide before hand what color I am going to use. While I am working, I am not conscious of what I am putting on the canvass. Each time I undertake to paint a picture, I have a sensation of leaping into space; I never know whether I shall fall on my feet. It is only later that I begin to estimate more exactly the effect of my work»

Just like Pablo Picasso mentioned above; whenever he wants to do what he truly enjoys doing, he is not conscious of the outcome and he leaps into space. Pablo Picasso is not governed by time but the possibility of his accomplishments. The time space continuum seizes to exist when you are in the flow of your true nature. Have you ever been involved in a task that you lost track of the time; you were literarily dragged away from it. It is like a deep sleep where you are not conscious of the environment. If you have ever been «in love» with a lady/man; you will understand this state of being your true self.

Look at Jay Jay Okocha; you can see the smile in his face when he loses an important direct kick and we can attest to his ability to experiment on the field of play. No matter how serious the match is, Jay Jay would always align to his true self. Jay jay's true self is not football like most people describe their true self by what they do. When I hear someone say «I am born to be a doctor or I am a diehard writer»; I can't help but smile at such ignorance because those profession or career line are simply a platform of expression. Jay Jay is a creative personality who can express his creativity best in the profession of football.

This is the cross that we mostly don't understand because Jay Jay expresses himself best in football does not mean he is born a footballer. If Jay Jay was born into a home filled with academia, Jay Jay may have been professional writer authoring many text books; his environment played a big role in his platform of expression. This is where the concept of providence comes to play; God places us in an environment because God believes that environment would align us to our true self expression. While most people have blamed their environment for their lack of success, others have used their environment as a fulcrum of success.

The Williams sisters are tennis champions because of their African American heritage; this should ordinarily be a hindrance to tennis championship but it is what drove them to be extraordinary. If Mandela was born in the United States, I am sure the world would not be celebrating his 90 years birthday. Mahatma Gandhi became legendary because he was an Indian citizen. Our true self and finding the best place to express our true self lies in the environment we find our self.

So many people extol my writing prowess and I tell those who care to listen that I am not such a great writer; I simply write as a platform of expression. I know my writing skill have improved a lot from when I started putting time and energy into writing; for my professor in school to recommend my paper to the Swedish Environmental Board, I definitely know I have improved my writing considerably. I was not always good in writing in fact writing was my Achilles heel; most courses I did not do well in my undergraduate days was because I could not construct words properly. I used to loathe anything that has to do with writing but now writing is a platform to express my growth passion and love for empowerment.

This is the foundation of Jacob's cross; expressing who you are in a dedicated platform. Jacob was a blessed man; whichever platform he engaged in, he was going to do the unfathomable. His partnership with his uncle Laban will give us insight into how to succeed financially in an uphill world. Jacob was already skilled in the arts of taking care of sheep before getting to his uncles house. His uncle noticed his good works and offered to pay him for it. Jacob instead demanded to work 7 years for his uncle's daughter Rachel. In working for any organization, working for time will never make you financially free especially if your aim is to have one position or the other like Manager, Senior Manager, etc.

Jacob's aim was Rachel and just like any other entrepreneur; they never live up to their promises until you give them more of your time. They dangle another offer your way, keeping you from your dream offer in order to buy more of your time. Jacob worked 14 years to secure his dream position and after attaining this dream, he was still financially impoverished. I can imagine many people who have waited longer than expected for promotions, salary raise, official car, etc and they keep getting disappointed. As they keep praying and waiting for this position, time is going and they gain nothing from it.

After Jacob attained the position he was looking for, he realized he had been chasing the wind. 14 years of his life slaving for someone without knowing who he was. Jacob decided to leave the organization and see what Laban the entrepreneur said «I will pay you more money for your time.» I have seen so many people stick to an organization because the entrepreneur is paying them more money. They know they are no longer aligned to the organization and their spirit and soul is no longer in the work but they stay because of the promise of more money.

Laban said something to Jacob that woke him up and made him understand who he truly was: «for a fortune teller that I consulted told me that many blessings I have been enjoying are all because of your being here. How much of a raise do you need to get you stay? Whatever it is, I will pay it.» This was news to Jacob just like most people in this world do not know their worth. He realized he was pivotal to the success of Laban but he should ordinarily have known this since he received the power of success from his father.

Jacob understanding himself decided to work for percentage instead of time. Remember for 14 years of working, he was still in the rat race; paying house rent, paying school fees, paying mortgage, changing car, occasionally travelling but he had no real economic power. After the decision to work for percentage, he became richer than Laban in six years; the speckled and the spotted sheep coming from all black sheep was something he has always known but he just put it to work after discovering himself. Despite the fact that Laban changed the rules many times, he was able to beat Laban to the game.

Understanding who you are and aligning yourself to it is the greatest good you can do to humanity. You encourage others who are afraid to take this path to do it. You will be able to FIRE YOUR BOSS by getting the proper respect you deserve. You will be able to make right judgments in investments and other important matter. I know money is a big factor that hinders people from being who they were designed to be but listen to what a billionaire film producer said; «Anyone who thinks money will make him happy hasn't got money; happy is harder than money.» I will end this particular message with what Steve Jobs (billionaire founder of Apple Computers) said:

«For the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: if today were the last day of my life, would I do what I am about to do today? And whenever the answer has been no for too many days in a row, I know I need to change

Abortion

I remembered an intimate situation I found myself 3 weeks ago and I decided to share it with my dear readers on the premise that it might be useful to someone;

I got out of my BMW on this fateful day when a brand new Avensis swept past me to park in front of me in my office garage. I tried to peep into the front car and I was amazed to see my former colleague nodding steadily obviously in tune with music blaring out of his CD. He had just moved from Glo to a bank; immediately he saw me, the glass of the car automatically wound down and an uncontrollable splash of air conditioning breezed through my already frigid skin. He immediately invited me to have a ride in his new car but our conversation was obstructed by my other colleagues who rushed for his attention.

I was immediately jealous and I felt so down that I hurriedly walked away from the scene to my office toilet. On closing the door to the toilet, I could not control the anger I felt as they kept pouring out. I immediately comported myself as the following conversation ensued between God and me;

Me: Why God? I have been praying for a promotion, but you have not done it.
God: Is there anything too hard for me to do?

Me: No, I suppose but you seem to favor some people over me.
God: Those that compare themselves are not wise.
Me: Please, how do I gauge my progress in life? I am not comparing myself, I am praying for something I need.
God: Then what are you doing feeling sorry for yourself. I have given you various opportunities to be promoted but you did not take them.

Me: What?
God: Remember, when I told you about the «automated routing» you were to propose to your boss but you ignored it.

Me: I did not know you were the one speaking to me.
God: You did, but you ignored it because you were afraid of how it will come out.

Me: Yes, I was afraid of being rebuked but I did not know it was you. If I knew, I would have boldly stood up because I could never disobey you.

God: Remember, your undergraduate days when you had a hunch to read some particular part of your physics note and exactly all the things you read came out; that was your first A on the campus. Am I right?
Me: Yes, God. Was that you?
God: Remember, your first day at Student Christian Movement fellowship and you felt at peace with the environment though you were a Moslem.
Me: Yes, were you the one?
God: Remember, when you finally broke up with your first fiancée. Who comforted you?
Me: I was traumatized Lord, that was no comfort.
God: You soul was shattered but your spirit was intact, this was necessary for maturity.
Me: Okay God, you speak in various ways.
God: No, I speak to you in patterns you understand; they may come in various forms but my sheep know my voice.

Me: What am I to do now?
God: I give seed to the sower- meaning anybody that is actively sowing seeds; I don't give the fruits.
Me: But I pay my tithe and give offerings in church.
God: Giving offerings and paying your tithe is commendable but I am talking about some other forms of seeds. I do not owe any man; when last were u sick? When last did you quarrel? When last did you have an accident?

Me: I am very sorry Lord, but I don't understand. What can I do to be promoted like my colleague?
God: You do not know what you ask for. Can you drink of the same wine he drinks from or be baptized with baptism he is baptized with?
Me: Yes Lord, I can.
God: That means you are willing to sleep for only 2 hours in a day. You are willing to write various business proposals and see them thrown to the drain by various investors until you can get it right. You are willing to invest your life savings in high risk ventures and lose it various times till you get it right. You are willing to look at your wife in the face, and put her money in places you are not comfortable with.
Me: No God, that's too much.
God: This is why you should not compare yourself with others but compete with yourself to reach the goals I give to you.
Me: Okay, I understand.
God: I have given you everything that pertains to life and Godliness. You aborted the idea I gave you, if you had obeyed the idea irrespective of your boss compliance, I would have led you to a higher dimension with me. If Abraham had aborted my ideas, there would not have been an Israel. If Jesus had aborted the idea of not dieing, I doubt I will be talking to you today. The light afflictions you are facing now are going to work out for your eternal glory.
Me: Oh God, I am very sorry for aborting the plan you gave me?
God: Do not despise the days of little beginning. Just like I told Moses; the rod he used in tending for his father-in-law sheep is the same rod that he used in delivering the Israelites. The way David looked after his fathers' sheep conscientiously is the same way I knew he will take care of my people when I make him King. So Dipo, whatever is in your hand, do it with all your heart.
Me: Ok Lord, I will.

God: Do not abort this idea, they are for generations unborn……………...

NOTE: All these conversation with God took place over a period of time.

Reasons why Females get Hurt.

I wonder why I keep putting off the sequel to the piece «LOVE WAN TITI» despite my readers craving to see the conclusion. Well to tell the truth, I have not been sleeping well so I have lost all effort to write. I forced myself to sleep at 3.00am this morning after entertaining myself with the DVD - 24, Season 5. The film was so gripping that I forgot the time and the fact that I had to work the next day. I was immediately awoken at 6.00a.m to do my normal chores before bolting to work when this article I am about to write came to me

Self Centeredness

Most females enter relationship (consciously, subconsciously or unconsciously) with a self centered motive. No wonder comments like «he has not asked me to marry him and I have let go of other suitors», «all men are bad», «I have feelings for that guy and he is not asking me out», etc. Since females are crammed and mostly stuck on relationship issues, it suffices to say that they make no effort to understand the male counterpart. If the male counterpart does not meet their preferences, they get worried unnecessarily and develop a pattern of helplessness. They fail to see their contribution in the whole relationship problem and continue casting blame. This in itself is one of the greatest issues of relationship amidst other self imposed vices.

Openness in Communication

Females have a firm belief that they are wired naturally not be open in dealing with their male counterparts. Imagine a female going steady with a guy for 3 years and expecting to get married without voicing her intentions. Why spend 3 years with a guy and you can not tell him how you feel? Why believe that you will lose something by speaking openly with a guy you intend to marry? The only thing you will lose is pride and fear. My dear females, you are not wired to be closed, you chose to be closed because you are afraid of the outcome of being open.

The Weakling Mentality

Females actually believe they are the weaker sex so they allow the man define their happiness. The cultural conditioning gives them this «I need to be pampered and taken care of» mentality. Truth the told, you are created to be a help-meet to a man not to be pampered by a man. You may not be as physically strong as a man but you have a stronger influence. What you lack, you are compensated by other sense of strength. Females fail to maximize their potential for the good of the relationship but sit back defining set of roles for themselves.

A female friend complained to me that she has been slapped by her husband and she wanted a divorce. Then I asked what she did but she claimed she did not do anything. I asked her if her husband had a mental problem and she looked at me obviously shocked with the question. She said no. I asked her if she has ever heard or seen her husband slapped other females like his colleague or even her sister. She said no. So your husband woke up one morning looked at you and slapped you. She did not wait for me to explain as she called me a chauvinistic pig. After much discourse, she finally made me understand she had nagged and insulted him because he failed to keep to a promise of buying her a shoe.

Trust is not Love

Many females do not know the difference between trust and love. The story above indicates females' inability to love without trust. From my friend's story, that was the first time the man hit him and she was obviously shocked at his reaction. Since, I can not judge the man without hearing his own side of the story, I told her she was expected to love her hubby and trust God. Man is fallible, no matter how wonderful he appears and perfects himself to be. If females have it in the back of their mind that every man out there is not perfect, it will easier for them to transit issues flawlessly. They will commit their man to God, and confirm his strength not emphasize on his weakness. Jesus loved humans but did not commit himself to them because he knew they were weak.

Lack of Kingship

Most females lack Kingship; they fail to understand their rights to protect their relationship territory. God made man; male and female he made them. The first assignment he gave this male and female is to dominate their territory. Most females do not know their role as partner to their husband. They are expected to lift their families to God and bear the burdens of the relationship with the man. A girl is going out with a guy and she is praying for the guy to ask her hand in marriage instead of praying for the guy's solvency to life's issues like financial, political and social. She expects to be a liability instead of an asset to the man. She looks down upon herself and tells God that only this man can make her happy. If you pray for the man's success (not putting one leg out and one leg in), God will reward you with the man.

Commit to the Relationship

Females get overwhelmed by deep emotional turmoil so in order to free themselves; they look for the easy alternative which is to guard their heart from such pains. This alternative could easily be avoided if their perspective to relationship was different- commit to the relationship not to the man. The man is subject to change because he is human and it may be difficult to handle such evolution. You will be able to adapt to his new state of mind of the man, if you commit to the relationship instead of the man. An example is a man that looses his job and decides to drink as a solace to his problem. If you commit to the man, it will be difficult to pray for him without seeing him in the light of his present position. This nullifies your belief which is a prerequisite for answered prayers.

Lack of Purpose

Before a woman enters a committed relationship, she is expected to have a defined purpose which should align with the purpose of the proposed man. When a female has a purpose, it is easy to decipher your emotional weakness when choosing your life partner. If you base your relationship on an ephemeral stuff like the kind of car he drives, how good he is in bed or how tall he is, you will end up getting hurt after 2 years into that said relationship. Choose your partner based on purpose so you will have something to hinge on during crisis which is inevitable.